[ Something close to guilt forms before Robby can really establish why he feels guilty--because if he takes the minute to think about it, he probably is part of the reason his dad stopped getting involved with Cobra Kai. Him and Kreese always seemed to have more of the history, and between his breakdown and Miguel running off to Mexico, his dad must've figured that was the place he should focus from then on.
What more could they actually do about Cobra Kai? How do you stop a business from running, that provided nothing but wins in tournaments? ]
Everything just...it felt like a lot back then. The tournaments, the drama in-between; I don't know how it was for you two, [ when they were working together, or even in the time he was in juvie, ] but with me and everything going on with the Diazs, nothing ever feeling like it was getting better...
[ But Robby can't finish that. How can he, when he's saying all this to Mister LaRusso--who continued to try and fight, got his ass kicked for it? Trying to explain his dad, a man he's still learning, trying to know-- ]
It was easier to quit. [ --but in reality, only explaining himself as he looks at Mister LaRusso with a complicated, unhappy expression. ] It was hard to see a way forward.
[ ...and yet, it doesn't feel right to even leave it at, true as the words are. Because there's been time since he left, time since the exhaustion of dealing with Tory and Kenny has become worrisome again. He couldn't get them out by himself, no, not just by his words. ]
...but the students there need a way out, too. Silver was just as bad as Kreese--he didn't care how you won. And they, uh--they really changed for the worse. [ He tips his head aside. ] And me.
[ He's acknowledged as much already, but maybe it bears repeating, just the way that dojo can screw with you. So maybe, even if it's hard, even if it seems impossible--taking it out is always a cause worth fighting. Not giving up for.
Robby lifts his gaze, briefly lowered, back over to Mister LaRusso. ]
[ Daniel does listen, even if he doesn't look in the boy's direction while he's doing so. Despite having spent quite some time in this place already, it's not like what happened back home doesn't still have its claws deep within Daniel, especially when he's had no one to talk about it, only idle time and more idle time to ponder all of it all by himself.
It makes it so easy to fall back into negative thoughts at everything Robby says. First the talk about Johnny - and maybe Johnny was the one in the right, maybe Daniel was crazy for continuing to fight, forever the one between the two of them who didn't know how to back then when he should, you couldn't leave well enough alone, you little twerp?
But he couldn't leave Cobra Kai alone. Not with what has been haunting his mind, the thoughts Robby voices here too. Cobra Kai is so bad. It's terrible for kids. If Daniel doesn't stop it, then more kids will keep getting hurt - just like Daniel was, all those years ago. (He knows how bad Silver is, doesn't need Robby to tell him, though he's keenly aware Robby has no idea just how well Daniel knew decades before getting beaten up by the man.)
And he lost. He didn't get anything done. He got people hurt, got Mike's store burned down, got his own ass kicked, then disappeared off to this place.
It looks like Daniel is wilting on the spot, only the fact that he doesn't want Robby to have to worry about him even further keeping him from just staying quiet altogether. The nausea still present in his stomach and the droning pain in his head sure doesn't help either. ]
He is the one who committed the crime Kreese was sent to jail for. He most likely set him up.
[ Maybe it's why his answer is relatively brief, despite everything Robby says. Daniel doesn't know how to address any of the rest of it that doesn't involve feeling like he failed in every single regard of his plan.
Especially in front of Robby. Robby, who got helped by Johnny, while Daniel was doing nothing but failing at the one thing he set out to do. ]
[ His own cowardice peels back at Robby--pathetic, really, when he gave up over and over for what he played a part in. He didn't even think about it much; he never thought about what Mister LaRusso might've been doing, or thought about Cobra Kai as anything other than a brick wall. A dead end.
Tory was more stubborn than he was, and Kenny--he didn't even know who he was, now.
Mister LaRusso's message at least spares Robby from suffering too far in that mentality, though--because it hits him, wide-eyed and staring at Mister LaRusso, like he'd said the words himself. ]
Silver did? How-- why? I thought they... [ Does it even matter what Robby thought? He doesn't bother to finish, taking in a breath, but still trying to even wrap his head around it. Why is everything so insane? ]
[ Daniel shakes his head in response. There's so little he knows about the entire ordeal as well, after all. Even if Robby didn't finish his sentence, Daniel is pretty sure his mind was going in the same direction as Daniel's own - why would they even bother to betray each other? Weren't they working together? Even way back, decades ago, they had been working together. That had been the entire problem, the entire cause for Daniel's shame, his broken trust.
There's already enough negative feelings trying to nest within him though, so it's a little easier to let go of that one for the moment. ]
I got something in the mail. A newspaper article about the incident. Someone wrote that the guy who got beaten up had lied. I don't know who sent it.
[ He did contemplate it being a trap by Silver, but-- the information had been right. And if he thinks back on his confrontation with Silver - not something he likes to do, but something that's burned into his brain all the same - then it's not like the guy seemed particularly happy that Daniel found out, or that he was trying to get Raymond to testify against Silver. ]
It's how Silver cornered me. I first went to talk to the guy with someone else, but then later returned on my own, and then Silver was waiting for me there instead of him.
[ Sorry, Robby.
Things were wild while you were getting distracted by your dad's antics. ]
[ Someone knew about it... unless it had somehow been Kreese, but for the moment he thinks about that, he wonders if Kreese would have sent mail to Mister LaRusso of all people. Would he? Granted, he doesn't have a good idea about the man to know what he would do.
(He had done his best to ignore the parts of Cobra Kai he didn't like, after all. Isn't Cobra Kai just about winning, and surviving?)
But none of this is right--Mister LaRusso shouldn't have been by himself. Robby knows that things can't be made different, you can't change what's happened, but knowing what they've left back home and the mess that needs to be picked up--it's a frustration in his throat he can't swallow down. He could talk to his dad. He could talk to Tory again, Kenny--
Instead, they're stuck here. And Mister LaRusso... the state of him sticks with Robby when he looks at the man (and he's looking nowhere else). There's a mess they've left behind, and what was Mister LaRusso drinking about? Being away from his family? Silver being closer to them than he is?
He stands there, with so little to give. ]
--He's not getting away with it. With you gone, and me disappearing too? That's gonna cause problems for him and put our families on alert if he's the last person that saw you. I know it's not good to think about, [ worrying too deeply about what their families are going through, what they might be doing, ] but that's not going to be it for Silver... and right now...
[ He's stepping over, closer to Mister LaRusso; bringing them a step away from one another, just to allow them still their own space. Chin tilted up at him, meeting his eye. ]
...you should take it easy. You can sleep some more--unless you want some food first. But you can use my room instead of going back to your apartment. Plus...
[ ... ] You're not alone now.
[ Robby adds it weakly--at least, weak in the attempted positive note, a smile tugging on his lips. He doesn't know if being alone was a problem for the man, or what truly had him close to catatonic out by the graves, and he doesn't particularly want to ask either, but--
but maybe it can mean something small. Some kind of comfort, instead of landing nowhere at all. ]
Robby is right in his earlier assessment - that it's not good to think about those other things. Daniel has been desperately trying to avoid thinking of what happened back home and its consequences, even if his anxiety- and depression-riddled mind didn't give him an easy time with trying to ignore those things. But he doesn't want to think about what Silver could be doing now, whether he'd try to follow up on his threat despite the circumstances. He doesn't want to think about how worried Amanda might be, or the kids. Despite the fight they had, surely Amanda would-- She'd still notice, eventually, she'd still care..
And he's hurt her enough.
So Daniel still doesn't want to think about that, even now. It makes him feel a little childish, especially when Robby - so much younger than him - is willing to address it, willing to reassure him, even though that should be the other way around here.
But thankfully the boy gives him something better to think about. Something positive in the middle of all the things that threaten to make Daniel stand on the cliff side of losing his mind, between his worried about everything back home and his worries about this place.
And that positive thing is Robby's presence. His sweet care, the way he words things.
Even if so much changed, it's like nothing has changed at all.
Daniel did look particularly miserable, discussing all of this, but it's when Robby speaks those last words and stands closer to him and smiles at him that the misery fades a little from the man's features. Not fully gone, especially not in the middle of a half-drunk-half-hangover state, but..
He smiles.
It means something.
Daniel doesn't address it using his phone, but it's like his gaze and that small smile say just as much as words could. He isn't alone, indeed. He's glad he isn't alone, even if that gladness might be selfish, even if Robby shouldn't be here.
Instead, when he types on his phone, it's just for it to read out: ]
I should eat something first. But then I will sleep.
[ Like Robby was fussing about at him a few moments ago-- ]
I don't want to make you worry too much about me here. [ Even if Daniel is giving the poor boy way too many reasons to do so. ]
[ They're small motions of recognition, and they're enough--they're fine, when Mister LaRusso smiles. Because words alone are all they have, and maybe hope; until they can find more in this place, some better proof to Robby's point, or even a way out.
A way out would be good. A way back home would be really, really good.
The smile he gives back to Mister LaRusso is brighter, comes after his last message; after he's leaned off from the fridge, his hand now on its handle. ]
I'm worrying enough, [ he semi-chides, asserts, whichever way the man wants to take it. Looks at the fridge briefly. ] You want toast, a sandwich? There's meats in here. [ He tugs on the handle. ] You can pick what you want. I'll grab bread.
[ Which will mean them switching around, but hey, it'll be easier for Mister LaRusso to choose his sandwich (or toast) additions than for Robby to list out what they have. And Mister Larusso will probably feel better than if Robby babied every part of making food for him. ]
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strongroots) wrote2023-07-11 06:52 pm
no subject
What more could they actually do about Cobra Kai? How do you stop a business from running, that provided nothing but wins in tournaments? ]
Everything just...it felt like a lot back then. The tournaments, the drama in-between; I don't know how it was for you two, [ when they were working together, or even in the time he was in juvie, ] but with me and everything going on with the Diazs, nothing ever feeling like it was getting better...
[ But Robby can't finish that. How can he, when he's saying all this to Mister LaRusso--who continued to try and fight, got his ass kicked for it? Trying to explain his dad, a man he's still learning, trying to know-- ]
It was easier to quit. [ --but in reality, only explaining himself as he looks at Mister LaRusso with a complicated, unhappy expression. ] It was hard to see a way forward.
[ ...and yet, it doesn't feel right to even leave it at, true as the words are. Because there's been time since he left, time since the exhaustion of dealing with Tory and Kenny has become worrisome again. He couldn't get them out by himself, no, not just by his words. ]
...but the students there need a way out, too. Silver was just as bad as Kreese--he didn't care how you won. And they, uh--they really changed for the worse. [ He tips his head aside. ] And me.
[ He's acknowledged as much already, but maybe it bears repeating, just the way that dojo can screw with you. So maybe, even if it's hard, even if it seems impossible--taking it out is always a cause worth fighting. Not giving up for.
Robby lifts his gaze, briefly lowered, back over to Mister LaRusso. ]
Did you find out anything? About Silver?
no subject
It makes it so easy to fall back into negative thoughts at everything Robby says. First the talk about Johnny - and maybe Johnny was the one in the right, maybe Daniel was crazy for continuing to fight, forever the one between the two of them who didn't know how to back then when he should, you couldn't leave well enough alone, you little twerp?
But he couldn't leave Cobra Kai alone. Not with what has been haunting his mind, the thoughts Robby voices here too. Cobra Kai is so bad. It's terrible for kids. If Daniel doesn't stop it, then more kids will keep getting hurt - just like Daniel was, all those years ago. (He knows how bad Silver is, doesn't need Robby to tell him, though he's keenly aware Robby has no idea just how well Daniel knew decades before getting beaten up by the man.)
And he lost. He didn't get anything done. He got people hurt, got Mike's store burned down, got his own ass kicked, then disappeared off to this place.
It looks like Daniel is wilting on the spot, only the fact that he doesn't want Robby to have to worry about him even further keeping him from just staying quiet altogether. The nausea still present in his stomach and the droning pain in his head sure doesn't help either. ]
He is the one who committed the crime Kreese was sent to jail for. He most likely set him up.
[ Maybe it's why his answer is relatively brief, despite everything Robby says. Daniel doesn't know how to address any of the rest of it that doesn't involve feeling like he failed in every single regard of his plan.
Especially in front of Robby. Robby, who got helped by Johnny, while Daniel was doing nothing but failing at the one thing he set out to do. ]
no subject
Tory was more stubborn than he was, and Kenny--he didn't even know who he was, now.
Mister LaRusso's message at least spares Robby from suffering too far in that mentality, though--because it hits him, wide-eyed and staring at Mister LaRusso, like he'd said the words himself. ]
Silver did? How-- why? I thought they... [ Does it even matter what Robby thought? He doesn't bother to finish, taking in a breath, but still trying to even wrap his head around it. Why is everything so insane? ]
How did you find that out?
no subject
There's already enough negative feelings trying to nest within him though, so it's a little easier to let go of that one for the moment. ]
I got something in the mail. A newspaper article about the incident. Someone wrote that the guy who got beaten up had lied. I don't know who sent it.
[ He did contemplate it being a trap by Silver, but-- the information had been right. And if he thinks back on his confrontation with Silver - not something he likes to do, but something that's burned into his brain all the same - then it's not like the guy seemed particularly happy that Daniel found out, or that he was trying to get Raymond to testify against Silver. ]
It's how Silver cornered me. I first went to talk to the guy with someone else, but then later returned on my own, and then Silver was waiting for me there instead of him.
[ Sorry, Robby.
Things were wild while you were getting distracted by your dad's antics. ]
no subject
(He had done his best to ignore the parts of Cobra Kai he didn't like, after all. Isn't Cobra Kai just about winning, and surviving?)
But none of this is right--Mister LaRusso shouldn't have been by himself. Robby knows that things can't be made different, you can't change what's happened, but knowing what they've left back home and the mess that needs to be picked up--it's a frustration in his throat he can't swallow down. He could talk to his dad. He could talk to Tory again, Kenny--
Instead, they're stuck here. And Mister LaRusso... the state of him sticks with Robby when he looks at the man (and he's looking nowhere else). There's a mess they've left behind, and what was Mister LaRusso drinking about? Being away from his family? Silver being closer to them than he is?
He stands there, with so little to give. ]
--He's not getting away with it. With you gone, and me disappearing too? That's gonna cause problems for him and put our families on alert if he's the last person that saw you. I know it's not good to think about, [ worrying too deeply about what their families are going through, what they might be doing, ] but that's not going to be it for Silver... and right now...
[ He's stepping over, closer to Mister LaRusso; bringing them a step away from one another, just to allow them still their own space. Chin tilted up at him, meeting his eye. ]
...you should take it easy. You can sleep some more--unless you want some food first. But you can use my room instead of going back to your apartment. Plus...
[ ... ] You're not alone now.
[ Robby adds it weakly--at least, weak in the attempted positive note, a smile tugging on his lips. He doesn't know if being alone was a problem for the man, or what truly had him close to catatonic out by the graves, and he doesn't particularly want to ask either, but--
but maybe it can mean something small. Some kind of comfort, instead of landing nowhere at all. ]
no subject
Robby is right in his earlier assessment - that it's not good to think about those other things. Daniel has been desperately trying to avoid thinking of what happened back home and its consequences, even if his anxiety- and depression-riddled mind didn't give him an easy time with trying to ignore those things. But he doesn't want to think about what Silver could be doing now, whether he'd try to follow up on his threat despite the circumstances. He doesn't want to think about how worried Amanda might be, or the kids. Despite the fight they had, surely Amanda would-- She'd still notice, eventually, she'd still care..
And he's hurt her enough.
So Daniel still doesn't want to think about that, even now. It makes him feel a little childish, especially when Robby - so much younger than him - is willing to address it, willing to reassure him, even though that should be the other way around here.
But thankfully the boy gives him something better to think about. Something positive in the middle of all the things that threaten to make Daniel stand on the cliff side of losing his mind, between his worried about everything back home and his worries about this place.
And that positive thing is Robby's presence. His sweet care, the way he words things.
Even if so much changed, it's like nothing has changed at all.
Daniel did look particularly miserable, discussing all of this, but it's when Robby speaks those last words and stands closer to him and smiles at him that the misery fades a little from the man's features. Not fully gone, especially not in the middle of a half-drunk-half-hangover state, but..
He smiles.
It means something.
Daniel doesn't address it using his phone, but it's like his gaze and that small smile say just as much as words could. He isn't alone, indeed. He's glad he isn't alone, even if that gladness might be selfish, even if Robby shouldn't be here.
Instead, when he types on his phone, it's just for it to read out: ]
I should eat something first. But then I will sleep.
[ Like Robby was fussing about at him a few moments ago-- ]
I don't want to make you worry too much about me here. [ Even if Daniel is giving the poor boy way too many reasons to do so. ]
no subject
A way out would be good. A way back home would be really, really good.
The smile he gives back to Mister LaRusso is brighter, comes after his last message; after he's leaned off from the fridge, his hand now on its handle. ]
I'm worrying enough, [ he semi-chides, asserts, whichever way the man wants to take it. Looks at the fridge briefly. ] You want toast, a sandwich? There's meats in here. [ He tugs on the handle. ] You can pick what you want. I'll grab bread.
[ Which will mean them switching around, but hey, it'll be easier for Mister LaRusso to choose his sandwich (or toast) additions than for Robby to list out what they have. And Mister Larusso will probably feel better than if Robby babied every part of making food for him. ]